I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Randomize
