Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
