Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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