We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize
