My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Randomize
