Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
