Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Randomize
