Non-Jews are for practice
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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