M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
