just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
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