Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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