dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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