another moral hangover. fuck.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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