break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
