yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
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