i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
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