just tell him i said nine months
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
