I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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