hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Randomize
