Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize
