i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
