so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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