Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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