Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
