My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
You need Xanax blowdarts
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
