I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
