someone threw a dead crab at me
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
