sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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