Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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