This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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