The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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