The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
