I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
