is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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