the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
All I want is dick and wine.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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