Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
