My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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