I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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