he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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