Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
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