Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
