Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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