3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
My breasts were aching with rage.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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