also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
