I want to stick my p in your. b.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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