The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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