return my video game
Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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