Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize