I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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