We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
